Why Does it Sometimes Feel Like God is Ignoring Us?

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Why does it sometimes feel like God is ignoring us?

Why does it sometimes feel like God is ignoring us? How is it that we can pray for something over and over again with seemingly no answer?

It is written, “But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. I will sing to the Lord, for he has been good to me.” (Psalm 13:5-6)

Just because I’m not answering a prayer of yours, doesn’t mean I don’t hear it. Do you trust in My unfailing love? In My perfect timing?

Perhaps there’s a reason I am waiting to answer you. There’s more for you to learn in this challenge. More ways for you to grow.

As you have seen, I use all things for good for those who are called according to My purpose. I know how much you can handle and I’ve already told you, I won’t give you more than you can handle.

So don’t focus on that one prayer that I haven’t yet answered. You can’t understand My ways!

Instead, wait on me! Trust in me! Rejoice in me! Rejoice in all that I have done for you and all that I am doing. This brings us closer together. When we are close, your anxious mind can rest. Your heart can sing My praises. You can be the salt of the Earth as I’ve called you to be. And you can trust that I will handle the rest.

New Year Resolutions

New year resolutions are a funny thing. They’re usually abstract goals with no real objectives attached to them and thus, they rarely stick.

I think we should call them new year habits instead. Because this is what we’re really after, right? To rid ourselves of old habits that no longer serve us and form new, better and healthier habits in their place.

We’re creatures of habit. Whether we want to go to the gym more, eat healthier, or spend more time with friends, if we want the change to be long lasting, it needs to become a habit.

Research says it only takes two weeks to form a habit. So if we do something every day for two weeks, it’ll likely become a routine part of our life.

This is my hope for you, for everyone, and for myself. That we form new habits. Habits that will serve to further our goals for the year ahead.

Happy New Year!

The Faces of Christmas (A Poem)

Cold streets, winter nights

Warm windows, wrapped with lights

Loneliness and hands that freeze

Mistletoes and sparkling trees

Santa Clause finds some, not all

Some are at the Christmas Ball

While some are huddled close together

Under bridges, facing weather

Some are warm, by a fire

Some at stores, the constant buyer

Some in Church, singing praise

Some are gone, been so for days

As you join family and friends

Think of all the faces that Christmas lends

And don’t complain, whatever you do

There’s always someone who has it worse than you.

Thanksgiving

Maybe you could bare your shoulders,
lend that jacket that you’re over
to the man who’s standing there
waving cars down at the corner.
You know he’s only getting older
and Christmas is getting closer.
Give before Thanksgiving’s over
’cause it’s only getting colder.

The Dichotomy of Motherhood

I can’t catch a break. // Everything falls apart without me. // I’m grateful to have a family that needs me. // It feels so good to be needed. // I have no time to get anything done. // My to do list just keeps growing. // It’s so nice to be present with my baby. // Everything else can wait. // I’ve never known a joy like this. // I’m so tired I could cry. // Her needs are so constant. // One day she won’t need me. // I hate how fast time is going. // It’s so wonderful to watch her grow. // I don’t want to miss a single moment. // All I want is a moment to myself. // I killed it today! // Today nearly killed me.

The dichotomy of motherhood.

A Parenthood Self Reflection

Being a parent makes you think of yourself a lot less. And what a relief it is, to think of ourselves less. 

It makes you think of yourself a lot more, too. Which is easy to do when someone is reflecting your self back to you. 

Matrescence

I’m over five months pregnant and have been doing a ton of research on all things labor, delivery, newborns, and motherhood. But there’s one area in which research is lacking and that area is called, “Matrescence”. The term was coined by Dana Raphael, Ph.D. (1973) and it remains a largely unexplored area of study. In fact, I conducted a survey on my social media pages and 82% of women (mostly new mothers) had never even heard of the term!

In short, matrescence can be likened to adolescence. It refers to the process of becoming a mother. The developmental passage where a woman transitions through pre-conception, pregnancy, and birth, to the postnatal period and beyond. It recurs with each child. Of course, we all know that during pregnancy a woman’s body is changing rapidly and inside a tiny life form is taking shape to be a completely unique and individual human being upon birth. But what we often forget is that the woman herself is also changing rapidly and taking shape. Not just in a physical sense, but in a bio-psycho-social-political-spiritual way.

Yes, the mother gives birth to a child. But the child also gives birth to a mother.

Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh said it best, “The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new.”

I’m currently working on a series about Matrescence, including a poem, which will be the first of its kind. I can’t believe no other artist has delved into this topic before! I hope that you’ll stay tuned and share this information with the women in your life. New mothers, expecting mothers, and women who want to be mothers. May we all be comforted in knowing that we’re not alone.

A New Years Eve Poem

My hope for you this New Year

is forgiveness of yourself and others,

revival of what matters most,

relationships with friends and lovers.

My hope for you is motivation,

bigger dreams, and inspiration.

Realistic goals and follow through,

these things are my hope for you.

My hope for you this New Year

is healing what you’ve broken;

repairing, mending, letting go

of all apologies left unspoken.

I hope when you look back to where

 you were this time last year,

you’re in an entirely different place.

Your truest self is ever near.

I hope that you have grown and changed.

With open arms embrace the pain,

search for joy and new love, too.

These things are my hope for you.

Making Hypotheses About Others

The way the brain works is this: We make a hypothesis about someone, and then our brain searches for information to verify our hypothesis.

For example, if we decide that someone is untrustworthy, our brain will find information to support that belief. In other words, we actively make our beliefs true.

If instead, we choose to believe that this same person is a flawed but good human being who is simply doing their best, we may find proof to back it up.

Be mindful of the hypotheses you’re making.

A Breakdown of Relationships

Relationships can be complicated but the breakdown of their success is really quite simple.

Relationships built on mutual values and goals, work. Both parties feel a sense of belonging to something greater than themselves. When there is no sense of shared values and goals, the individuals begin to feel disconnected and confused about their purpose which often leads to the relationship falling apart.

So how do you establish mutual values and goals?

Through clear communication that allows for give and take, enabling you to build the trust that every relationship needs.

Clear communication rules include:

Do what you say you are going to do, when you say you are going to do it.

Praise in public, criticize in private.

Don’t bully people into agreeing with you.

Respect the other’s opinion.

When we focus on the goals of the relationship as a whole, and they align with the goals of each individual that’s a party to the relationship, success inevitably follows.