“The future is not the result of choices among alternative paths offered in the present – it is a place that is created – created first in the mind and will; created next in the activity.” – Walt Disney
With my sister’s wedding now just ten days away, I wanted to share with you all a poem I wrote for her Fiancé, my future Brother-in-Law, on how to make her happy. I think you will find this poem is applicable to many relationships, not just theirs. And perhaps, at the very least, it will warm your heart.
How To Make My Sister Happy
First off, she loves you,
so just stick around.
When she gets carried away,
you hold her down.
She likes fancy things
so every once in a while,
splurge a little on her.
Gifts make her smile.
Listen to her.
Consider her needs.
Put yourself second
and remember to breath.
When she asks for space,
respect and believe her.
The love you will gain
is based on how you treat her.
So treat her with kindness
and forgive her with ease.
Enjoy every moment.
Love her good for me, please.
A milk has gone bad, throw it away.
Your tires are flat, switch them up.
No need to complain or make sense of these things
All that you’ve done is enough.
A lover has left, let them go free.
Wages were lost, look for more.
No need to dwell or make sense of these things
Resistance can be quite the bore.
Surrender to what is,
then do what you can.
There’s no need to ask,
“Why must this occur?”
For all that you need
is right where you stand.
And you can’t fathom Ways
that are higher than yours.
Our most difficult task is to live in the present
Yes, this must be our most difficult task
To live truly free, from the angst of the future
All chains broken, from the links of the past
Our most pressing issue, our deepest concern
Our happiness well, the love for which we yearn
All here in the present, waiting for us
Though it is difficult, meet there we must
The only place where God exists
The here, the now, a heavenly bliss
While all the world serves to distract
To live in the present, our most difficult task.
Some people live in the past, we call them stuck. Some people live in the future, always striving, and we call them successful.
But the truth is, these people are no better off than those who are stuck in the past because the only truly successful people are the ones living in the present.
Just like if humans were to create robots that turn against us, so does suffering breed the very thing that ends it: compassion.
At the ripe, young age of 24, I asked my father for his advice on seeking a career. He told me if he could do things differently, he would have been more strategic and selective in choosing his career path, rather than taking whatever came his way and running with it. This seems to be the trend of our time: People letting life happen to them instead of making the life they want happen. We see it all the time. Adults having mid life crises, wondering how in the world they got to where they are.
But there’s a flip side. Trying too hard to make the life you imagine happen can hold you back from the life you were destined to have. You can become so paralyzed by the standards you’ve set for yourself that you often feel as though you’re making no progress at all. Unable to choose between open doors because you don’t know where any particular one will take you.
This is where faith comes in. Faith coupled with action yields results. It’s not enough to sit back and let life happen to you, as the entire universe is devoted to your distraction. But at the same time, it is neither wise nor productive to try so hard to control your future that you end up missing your destiny. As with everything in life, a balance is key.
Start living today. Start doing the things that you want to today. No excuses. No one knows what the future holds. Besides, what good does it do to live in the “one of these days” mindset? The life you have is today. The time to live it is now. Living and waiting are not mutually exclusive! But waiting to live is dangerous.